I like to clip coupons. I don't necessarily always remember to use them, but it's cathartic for me to sit down with a stack of coupons and cut them out. I think maybe it's like a grownup version of what I used to do as a kid... and kinda like doing dishes (yes, I actually enjoy washing dishes) it keeps my mind occupied and relaxes me. Yes I do know that makes me weird... I won't fight you on that.

I used to only clip the coupons I planned to use, and the rest went into the trash. This week I decided to clip them all and bring the extras to work, someone may as well make use of them. I guess I've been brainwashed about recycling, or maybe it's the economy, but I was feeling nice (it happens to even the worst of us). So I put the coupons into a coffee cup in the break room, but didn't really tell many people about it, just 2 or 3. Lo and behold, this morning there were more coupons on my desk... the Coupon Fairy came... none of the the people who knew what I was doing claim to have put the insert on my desk so I don't know where it came from. Kinda cool. I'm um... gonna start the same thing but with money, so feel free to drop off any unwanted currency, Currency Fairy!

I'm currently reading You Have To Kiss A Lot of Frogs - if I thought I had some dating disasters, the main character in this novel puts me to shame. Each chapter is basically about a different relationship (and I use the term 'relationship' loosely), why it didn't work out, what she was thinking as it was happening... It's good to know that I'm not the only one who's had some of these experiences, that someone else has made the same mistakes as I have. I don't have an extensive history because I pretty much know early on whether I'm interested or not, and I don't waste anyone's time if I'm not. I'm also just not the girl that guys randomly approach in the freezer section of the grocery store, or if they do, I clearly don't know the signals to send to get me from 'hi' to 'yes, I'd love to go out with you sometime.' No one believes this, because I put on 'the Kristy show' when I'm feeling anxious, but I'm extremely shy. When it comes to putting myself out there, it has to come from the other person first.

I was once told by a friend that I don't want to date, I want an instant relationship. I couldn't argue the point because I hate all of the awkwardness in the beginning and I don't know how to muddle through it. I really don't like to date, or at least what I perceive dating to be. I don't like the games or the uncertainty. And I'm not innately curious, so I don't have questions at the ready, I have to take the conversation as it comes and rely heavily on the other person to help me out. It means that I can't talk to just anyone, I need the other person to have some snap, to say the thing that leads to the next thing so that the conversation feels (oh how I hate this term) organic. I like conversations that are like a ping-pong match... you... me... you... me... you... I don't like boorish people who always bring the conversation back around to themselves. I don't like talking to people who can't respect my opinion, whether they agree with it or not. I also don't like talking to people who always agree with me, because that's no fun either. People who interrupt me, or can't focus for two seconds really annoy me -the ones who, in the middle of your sentence, call out to someone and then apologize for it just before they do it again; the people who are always looking for the next best thing. I'm a complicated beast, but I'm so, so simple.

Ah well, time to hit the treadmill. It's kind of a sad goal, but I'm going to try to run at 5 mph for 5 minutes straight on a 2% incline (and then alternate running and walking atfor the rest of the 30 mins). Baby steps. I'm not actually tired after 2 minutes, I'm not even breathing heavy, I'm just starting to think that I don't like to run... Dangit, I'm a total social handicap - I don't like coffee, tea, or beer, and now this...